every time..

every time our song comes on shuffle, i think of how sweet you used to be when you would sing it to me and even when you weren’t there you would sing to me on the phone. i know i sound pathetic to still be hung up on you. but you were the only guy who was so genuine and honest with me. everyone else is scum. plain and simple. i just wish you wouldn’t let your friends influence your mind. when its just me and you, its so simple and perfect. why can’t you grow up and see how much i care, even though i should not give a shit about you… but i do .. and i always will.

finally

urgh i could not be happier with this situation. finally finally finally i met someone who might have potential. i had the most humiliating moment of my life.. but to my surprise, it wasn’t that bad. and was completely understood. thankful for random encounters and strange connections

so i guess this is what i gotta do

"he kissed my lips, i taste your mouth"

so i hung out with this guy last night and he’s really cute, unbelievably sweet and such a gentleman. so what’s the problem, then? all i could think about is you. wishing it was you. wishing i was kissing you. wtf is wrong with me.. i guess i will just smile and tell my friends i met this amazing guy and he makes me smile.. even though all i still want is you.. and it makes no sense because you suck and talk to me every now and then.. why do you have such a spell over me.. i don’t get it.

it’s kinda funny…

when i first met you… you were insanely into me.. and i really wasn’t into you… i knew you liked me so i gave you a chance.. and i fell for you… hard… Honestly, you are the funniest, sweetest guy i’ve ever known.. when you aren’t with your friends… but you are also the biggest asshole i have ever encountered and i just wish you had never spoke a word to me so i wouldn’t be so sad about this now.. i didn’t have high hopes that you would follow through with your plans for July .. but i always have that little bit of hope that maybe this time will be different… but once again… you suck.